The Unborn Army

The Unborn Army
by: Raven Keller

chapter one
To anybody else, that day would have been just like any other day in April. That day, however, Tiffanni wasn't anybody else. Sure, she wasn't the first girl to get into that kind of trouble. Abortions are a way of life in today's world. She just never thought that it would happen to her. She promised herself that she would be careful. The tears that ran down her face did not surprise her at all. It was hard on her, especially since she was alone.

With all due respect to Tiffanni and her problem, I must remind you that she and it are not the true beginning to this story. It started with the first girl, her problem, and the first clinic. It started with lives not lived, and minds that would never know knowledge. Tiffanni's solution was one that many before her had decided upon. But, I suppose that if a child can be made without care it can be disposed of in the same manor. You see, they would live, with or without parents. The unwanted children came back . . . and they were MAD!

Back to Tiffanni. The events of the recent past kept racing through her mind: Her boyfriend, who she thought would have stayed with her, (she couldn't understand how he could shake his head and walk away); how alone she had felt; and how scared. She felt as if everyone knew, and was watching her. What would her parents have done if they had found out about it, or this? The fear of what was about to happen to her filled her mind.

"How was your day?" her mother asked from behind her book.
Tiffanni made it to the stairs before she managed to reply. "It was all right, Mom." The stairs seemed steeper than usual. She made the climb and reached the door to her room. All she wanted to do was sleep. She opened the door and found a mess that was not there when she left that morning. "Oh well," she said to herself. "That's one for Richard." There was no battle with her little brother that day. She only wanted to rest.

In another place that has yet to be visited by any in the mortal world in their most horrific nightmares, there was no rest. There was again that night more additions to an unborn army. Tiffanni's child to be was with the many newcomers. There was a great deal of anger there. The stench of revenge was heavy and sweet in those halls. Revenge, a dish best served cold. There were many there that longed for its bittersweet taste. The law there was simple, and believed to be just. An eye for an eye. If they could not have a future life, neither then would the bad ones who denied life to them. Tiffanni's child arrived just in time. That night they would take their first bite.

It was not until the break of day that our world learned of the night's happenings. In a city to the north, a mother went to wake her twenty-year-old daughter. She found the girl lying on the bed face down. The mother called to her daughter, but there was no answer. The mother moved to shake the daughter and found the bed filled with a great puddle of blood. When the mother turned the girl over, she saw the large hole that had been ripped in the girl's abdomen. The mother shrieked as she retreated from the room.

Elsewhere, in a motel off I-80, a maid knocked on the door of a room that should have been vacated by that time. When there was no answer from inside, the maid drew her master key and opened the door. She found the entire place covered in blood. The bed and floor were drenched. The walls were covered. Even the mirror was stained red. Draped across the arm of a chair was a young woman. She was also covered in the red syrup that was previously in her veins.
When Tiffanni dragged herself out of bed in the morning, she was still tired. Her sleep had been off. When she finally opened her eyes, she saw the disarray of her room and remembered Richard's trickery from the day before. Tiffanni searched through the rubble to find her robe and put it on. She went to her brother's room. He was sound asleep. She very gently placed his headphones over his ears. She then selected some very loud music. The lead on the tape gave her enough time to make it to the breakfast table before a loud scream came from upstairs.
Tiffanni leaned against the kitchen counter with a glass of milk. As she took her first drink, an angry fifteen-year-old boy stormed into the kitchen.

"I'll get you for that, Tiff. Just you wait an' see!" Richard yelled, making more than the tolerable noise level for a Sunday morning.
"You deserved it!" Tiffanni said. "If you ever do that to my room again, I'll stick your toe in a light socket."
"You're gonna get it good next time! You wait an' see." Richard proclaimed at the same loudness.
"Shut up, idiot," Tiffanni threatened. "You're going to wake up mom and dad."
Tiffanni's warning came too late, again. Their father yelled from upstairs, "Shut up down there, or I'm going to swat some ass!"
Tiffanni slapped the little pest on the shoulder. "I told you they'd hear you."

Tiffanni went back to her room. She picked up a silver cross hung on a gold chain. She looked at it for a while. Then she looked down at the gold heart-shaped ring she wore. Both were gifts from David. She removed the ring and hung it on the chain with the cross. She'd be rid of them and the boy they were connected to the next morning in school.

Kim and Patty met Tiffanni at her locker. Kim began telling a story about a party that weekend when she stopped short. "You're not wearing David's cross. You didn't lose it did you?"
"No," Tiffanni said. "It's right here. He's getting it back today."
Patty said, "I thought you two were doing so well together."
"Really," Kim added. "You've had fights before and made up. What did he do that was so bad?"
"It's not what he did," Tiffanni said. "It's what he didn't do. There's no making up this time."
"Well here's your chance to tell him," Kim said. "Here he comes."

Tiffanni and Patty turned to see a group of four varsity track runners. In the middle was David. He was tall with blond hair and wore a letterman jacket. Kim and Patty bowed their heads to try to hide impending laughter. Tiffanni stood with her arms crossed and stared at David. As the boys approached, David took a quick glance back at his friends. Tiffanni held her stare solid and the cross hidden.

"About what happened last week," David said. "I wanted to say I'm sorry about what. . . " He was cut short. Tiffanni held the cross out dangling between her thumb and forefinger. David looked at the cross and then back at Tiffanni. "What's this?" he asked, already knowing the answer. Tiffanni let the cross fall to the floor. David watched it fall. She waited for him to look back up at her before turning to leave.

The English teacher was late to class, again. In the free minutes until he arrived, Kim and Patty gave their friend the third degree. "Now, Tiffanni," Kim started. "You can't keep it a secret forever. Tell us what happened."
"We have a right to know," Patty added. "We are your best friends."
"I know," Tiffanni said. There was a pause. Kim made a motion with her hand to urge Tiffanni to keep talking. Tiffanni just looked at her friends as if she had no idea what they wanted to know.
"Tell us," Kim said getting impatient.
"I can tell you," David said as he walked up behind the girls. Kim and Patty looked at David.
Tiffanni looked straight ahead with a scowl on her face. Her voice turned cold as she spit out, "Get the fuck away from me, you god damn maggot."
"You better watch what you say to me," David said. "I know you wouldn't want this story to get around. What would happen to your reputation?"
"You should worry about your own reputation," Tiffanni said.
"What's that supposed to mean?" David asked trying to conceal his puzzlement.
"Do you really want to know what happened?" Tiffanni asked without turning around.
There was a long pause before Kim whispered "Yes." almost too quiet to hear.

It was exactly the answer Tiffanni wanted. She stood and turned to face David. Her anger was clearly visible in her powder blue eyes. In a low cold tone she said, "David got me pregnant. And when I told him about it he ran off and left me. I had to go to the free clinic, alone, and have an abortion. Does anyone have any more questions?" Her eyes didn't blink. Her body didn't twitch. She only stared at the boy in front of her. David felt two inches tall. He wanted to crawl into a corner and die.
"You're a worm," Kim hissed.

David bowed his head and went back to sit with the other runners. When he sat down, the others got up and moved to other parts of the room. Tiffanni remained standing and swept the room with her eyes. When the rest of the students had slowly lowered their eyes from her, she returned to her seat and took several deep breaths. Patty reached over and gently touched Tiffanni's hand. Tiffanni returned the gesture with a smile. Just then the teacher walked in. He was surprised to find the class so quiet and stood looking around the room.
"So," he said. "How was everybody's weekend?"

chapter two
The rest of Tiffanni's day went quietly. There was an occasional whisper from behind a book and a few looks of pity. Even Kim and Patty steered the day's conversations away from the events that took place in English class. David's day was much the opposite. Many of his friends went out of their way to avoid him. The excuses they used were old and unimaginative. Even the so-called nerds of the school sneered and whispered insults as he walked by. David even skipped track practice. He had no stomach for competition.

When Tiffanni got home, she was surprised to find her mother watching T.V. instead of reading her book. "What are you watching?" Tiffanni asked from outside the room.
"Tiffanni, I didn't hear you come in." She seemed surprised. "I'm watching the news . . . How was your day?"
"Different," Tiffanni said. "What happened that has your undivided attention?"
Mrs. Catlogg turned off the T.V. "There's been a killing. The poor girl was ripped apart. The police haven't found a thing. Not even a single fingerprint. It was fairly close too, about three miles from here."
"Well Mom," Tiffanni said. "That’s the perfect topper to a perfect day. Thanks for sharing that wonderful piece of joy with me. You've really brightened the gloom."
"What are you talking about? Did something happen in school today?" Mrs. Catlogg asked.
"David and I broke up," Tiffanni said.
"I'm sorry," Mrs. Catlogg sympathized. "I hope you're not too hurt. These things happen after all."
"I'm fine," Tiffanni said.
"Good. Your father is getting off early and we're all going out for dinner," Mrs. Catlogg said as she picked up her book and sank back into the couch.
"Great," Tiffanni muttered as she headed for her room.
A ringing pierced the air and Tiffanni looked at the bright yellow princess phone in the corner of her room. In the middle of the forth ring, it was answered somewhere else in the house. Mrs. Catlogg called up, "Tiffanni, it's David."
Tiffanni picked up the receiver and yelled back, "O.K. mom, I've got it." After she heard her mother hang up the extension, she spoke into the phone cheerfully. "David." Then she slammed the phone down. She watched the phone and counted to herself. "Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four." The phone rang again. She shook her head at her missed timing and picked up the phone. "Hello . . . Oh David, was that you?.... It was?... Good then I hung up on the right person." She hung up again.

The next morning, Tiffanni was woken by a pounding on her bedroom door and her mother yelling. "Tiffanni, it's time to get up. You don't want to be late for school, do you?"
"No," Tiffanni growled as she threw her covers aside. She was still very tired. She sat on the edge of her bed and tried to force her eyes open. If she had been drinking, she'd swear she had a hangover.

Tiffanni left the house without saying good-bye. She had walked half a block when a station wagon pulled up beside her. Kim had her mother's car again. "Hey, sexy, you need a ride?"
Tiffanni chuckled. "How long do you have it this time?"
"She'll be gone until next Wednesday," Kim answered.
"We have it for the weekend?" Tiffanni was suddenly perked up.
"The entire weekend," Kim said.
"Let's find Patty," Tiffanni commanded.

Tiffanni stopped by her locker before study hall to drop off her books. Whoever needed books for study hall? Tiffanni was checking her hair in the mirror on her locker door when she heard Kim's voice bellow over the crowd. Patty and Kim were rushing down the hall when they suddenly slowed. Tiffanni turned to face David. He had a sad look on his face.
Tiffanni bowed her head and looked at David with shame on her face. In a sheepish tone she said, "David . . . "

Then, in an explosion of fury, she drove her knee into David's groin. A burst of fire shot into her eyes as David buckled over and leaned against her. She whispered in his ear, "Stay the fuck away from me." With that she let him fall to his knees.
Kim walked into study hall laughing. "Did you see the look on his face?"
"Why did you do that?" Patty asked.
"Listen and understand," Tiffanni said. "He knows that I don't want to see him. Until he figures out that I want a fifty-foot gap between us, he's going to be hurting."
"Well, if he hasn't figured it out now, it's because you jarred his brains loose," Patty said.
"That's not all she jarred loose," Kim added.
"All right," Tiffanni interrupted. "Enough about David. Let's talk about this weekend. Does anyone have any ideas?"
"We'll have a party at Kim's house," Patty said.
"So you can get drunk and pass out in my basement again?" Kim said. "No thanks, sweetheart."
"Wait a minute," Tiffanni said. "When did you pass out in the basement?"
"Never mind," Patty said.
"But it's such an interesting story," Kim said.
"So is the one about you and Jeff screwing in the mall parking lot," Patty retaliated.
"O.K., stop the fire works," Tiffanni said. "I just figured out what we're going to do this weekend."
"What?" both girls said in unison.
"We're going to stay at Kim's house," Tiffanni said. "And tell stories."

In that other place there was darkness. Savage unrest loomed over the domain the way a great scavenging bird hovers over fallen prey that has not let loose its hold on life. There were angry creatures there, beings that were not human and yet could not deny their humanity. They, the shapeless ones, carried in their souls a hate so violent and full of destruction that the light of their fury illuminated the darkness in a dull reddish glow that gave a sinister rival to the Aurora Borealis. Revenge! It had been theirs and it would be again soon. They had gorged themselves on the bittersweet delicacy and still they wanted more. There were more up there, in the light, that had not yet been reckoned with.

The choosing was random. One by one, each of the unborn took its turn at leading the rest to where they would take their revenge. Unlike the world of light, there were rules to the war that these soldiers fought. That war was a dark one. The unborn army had to attack at night. Also, the objective had to be alone. Last, and almost unimportant, the one denied life had to be the first to strike the bad one who denied life to the member of the dark crusade. The final rule was one that none considered to be a problem. Anger was a shared and driving force in that place. The battles were fought with swift cruelty that was so horrible that even the Nazi's would have thought it to be inhumane.

That night the shapeless ones would dine again. The bad one that killed a life that was half hers sat in the darkness of a newly emptied apartment. The bad one, in her mid twenties, was recently divorced. Her ex-husband took everything except two dining room chairs and the bed. Tears ran in a full stream down the girl’s face. As she rubbed her eyes, she found some small comfort in the thought that it couldn't get much worse.

The vengeful ones approached the ground floor apartment. The one leading boiled with a feminine fury that no male will ever understand if he lives as long as others die. As they drew near to the sliding glass door, the front ranks could recognize the burry vision of the bad one sitting on the floor with her chin on her knees. The leader of the raid stood outside with its hands on the glass, watching the bad one cry. Others of the army built a pyramid of small bodies until one of them could reach the door. The door slid open with a bang. A lump of horror formed in the bad one's throat when, like all the others, she recognized the undeveloped bodies for what they were. The leader gave a high-pitched shriek and the army charged. They were on the bad one before she had a chance to scream. They took the vital organ that, if left undisturbed, would have given the leader life. They left the remains lying on her back in a puddle of blood.
chapter three

Tiffanni was sitting on the hood of the station wagon leaning against the windshield with her eyes closed. The sun was bright and very hot. She lifted her head and looked over at Patty, who was leaning on the roof watching the school. "Do you see her yet?" Tiffanni asked.
"Not yet," Patty answered. "I wish her last class wasn't gym. I hate having to wait in this heat while she gets dressed."
"Be patient," Tiffanni said. "It's Friday and we have the car for the weekend! She'll be out soon."
Just then Kim burst through the side door at a full run.
"Here she comes!" Patty said.
Tiffanni sat up and watched Kim. She had her purse in one hand, her shoes in the other, and dripping wet hair. "You're not in any kind of hurry, are you, Kim?" Tiffanni asked.
Kim put her shoes on the roof and rummaged through her purse. "I didn't even dry my hair."
"You don't say," Patty said.
Kim found the car keys and tossed them to Tiffanni, telling her to drive. From the back seat Patty asked, "So, what's the plan?"
"Well," Tiffanni began. "You two are going to drop me off so I can get some things together, and do my hair. We'll meet at Kim's around six. That will give Kim enough time to put her hair dryer to work."
"Enough," Kim said, as she tried to tie her shoes.

The first thing Tiffanni did when she got home was take a shower. It was humid all day and she hated to feel sticky. She paused a moment as she rubbed soap on her stomach. She began to wonder about her baby. What would it have looked like? Would it have taken after her? Would it be a boy or a girl? Then she began to wonder if she could handle raising a child. David might have come back if she decided to keep it. But babies are expensive and she didn't even have a bank account, not to mention a job. How would she handle college? Then there was the matter of her parents. They would have killed her if they knew she had gotten pregnant. Then again, they would probably kill her if they knew she had an abortion. Her baby. She would have had a baby. Suddenly reality flashed and she remembered her plans.

The girls gathered in Kim's basement. It was a finished room with wood paneling. There was a wet bar along the far wall with four stools in front of it. A burgundy couch faced the fireplace. There was a matching chair and two end tables with a dark stain to match the paneling. Tiffanni turned on the radio while Kim searched the cabinets under the bar. Patty sank into the couch and put her feet up on the coffee table. Kim pulled a bottle out of a cabinet.

"What's that you have?" Patty asked.
"This," Kim said, "is a clear liquid commonly known as vodka."
"Are you shitting me?" Patty asked.
Tiffanni took the bottle and tasted it. "She's not shitting you. It's vodka."
Kim put glasses on the table and said, "Well, don't just sit there. Pour."

Two hours, three drinks each, and a pizza later, the girls were laughing in a half drunken state. They spent the rest of the night telling stories and sipping Kim's contraband liquor. Finally, when the vodka was gone and Patty was passed out asleep on the floor, Kim and Tiffanni sat trading secrets in an intoxicated honesty. After a few brief moments of silence, Tiffanni said, "I want my baby back."
"What?" Kim asked.
Tiffanni repeated. "I want my baby back. I should have never had an abortion. I was wrong to do it . . . I want my baby."
"Go back to David and ask him to give you another one," Kim said.
"I don't want David," Tiffanni said. "All I want is my baby." Tears began to roll down Tiffanni's face. Her sobbing turned into a full cry. She turned to Kim and in the midst of her tears said, "Dear God, Kim, get me my baby back."
Kim held her friend trying to comfort her. "I can't get it back. It's gone. It's all gone."
Kim rocked Tiffanni back and forth as she held her. After what seemed to be an eternity, Tiffanni's crying subsided and she fell asleep in Kim's arms. When Kim was sure that Tiffanni was sound asleep, she laid her on the couch and covered her with a blanket. Kim took a long deep breath. "I wish I could help Tiff. I really do."
The next morning Tiffanni woke with a slight headache. She sat up, rubbed her eyes and stretched.
"Good morning," Kim said from the chair. "How do you feel?"
Tiffanni noticed a note of concern in Kim's voice. "O.K., ." She said. "Why?"
"You were pretty broken up last night," Kim said. "I was worried. How did you sleep?"
"A little restless," Tiffanni said. "How about you?"
"Not at all. I sat up all night watching you. Do you remember what we talked about last night?" Kim said.
"Was I that drunk?" Tiffanni asked.
"I was," Kim said. "Until you started to talk the way you were."
"I'm sorry if I frightened you," Tiffanni said.
"Don't worry about it," Kim said. "Answer my question."
"Yes," Tiffanni said with a lump in her throat. "I almost wish I didn't."
"Was all that the truth? I mean, did you mean it when you said you wanted your baby back?" Kim asked.

Tiffanni got up and looked in the wall mirror without answering. As she wiped the smeared mascara off her face, a tear worked its way from her eye. She said, "Yes." And began to cry. She covered her face with her hands, making no attempt to hold back her tears.
The mixed pile of blanket, clothes, and Patty began to return to the living. Kim went to Tiffanni. She lifted the crying girl's head and looked into her eyes. "Stop crying right now," Kim said. "What's done is done. That baby is gone and its not coming back. Now you have to stop crying and deal with it. I don't want to see you cry about this again. No more tears. O.K."
Tiffanni sniffled and wiped her eyes. "All right. No more tears."
"Good,." Kim said, and she gave Tiffanni a hug.
Later that afternoon at the mall, the girls stopped at a small pizza place for lunch. Kim was nibbling on her pizza when she saw David and his friends. She watched as they walked by.
"Did you see a nice piece of ass, Kim?" Patty asked.
Kim stammered. "I thought I saw someone I know."
"Oh really," Tiffanni said. "Who?"
"No one special," Kim said. "Just your favorite track star."
"David?" Tiffanni asked.
Kim nodded her head.
"Well, let's go home," Tiffanni said.
"Why?" Patty asked.
"I don't want to meet up with him today, Patty," Tiffanni said.
"The mall is a big place," Kim said. "Do you know what the chances are that we'll run into him?"
"About two to one," Tiffanni said.
"Not if we avoid him," Patty said.
Tiffanni gave in. "O.K. You win," she said. "But if we meet up with him, you two owe me."
After finishing lunch, they continued on their shopping spree. In the first store they went into, Tiffanni found herself face to face with David. "Fancy meeting you here." She said as she glanced back at her friends.
"There goes the neighborhood," David said.
"Maybe if you leave, the property values will go back up," Tiffanni said.
"You're a bitch," David said.
"Count on it," Tiffanni said.
David motioned to the other boys. "Come on, let's get out of here."
"You're getting very good at walking out on people," Tiffanni hissed.
"I'm not the one that aborted my baby," David said.
"No," Tiffanni spit. "You abandoned it!"

A tear formed in Tiffanni's eye. It broke loose as she watched David walk out of the store. She wiped the tear away and tried to calm down. "Well," she said. "We sure did a wonderful job of avoiding him."

chapter four
The next day, Kim was the first to wake up. She was about half way through her breakfast when Patty stumbled into the kitchen rubbing her eyes. "How long have you been awake?"
"Not long," Kim said.
"Should we go wake up Tiffanni?"
"Later."
"What should we do today?"
"I don't know," Kim said. "Something quiet."
"And cheap," Patty added. "I won't be able to afford the mall again for six months."
"I got it," Kim said. "Let's go to the lake. I have some extra swimming suits that you and Tiffanni can wear."
"I look terrible in a bikini," Patty said.
"I have a one-piece you can wear," Kim said. "We can go all out. We'll pack a picnic lunch, and maybe pick up some soda pop on the way."
"That doesn't sound too bad," Patty said. "I haven't been to the lake in a long time."

They got everything ready while Tiffanni slept. Kim dug out two bikinis and the one-piece. When Patty got into the suit, she thought she might as well be wearing one of the bikinis. The one-piece was a designer suit that did not leave much to the imagination. She shrugged her shoulders and pulled a pair of shorts over the suit.

When the food was prepared, they went to wake up Tiffanni. Patty shook Tiffanni's shoulder and whispered, "Was it as good for you as it was for me?"
Still half asleep, Tiffanni rolled over and returned a confused, "What?"
Kim and Patty laughed. "Come on. Get up," Kim said. "We're going to the lake and you're the only thing that's not ready." She threw the bikini at Tiffanni.
Tiffanni stretched and asked, "What time is it?"
"About a quarter to eleven," Patty answered. "Get dressed."
Tiffanni picked up the scrap of fabric. "This is supposed to be a bathing suit, right?"
"It's supposed to be. Just get into it," Patty said.
"Get into what? There's nothing here," Tiffanni said.
"I've got worse," Kim said.
"Please don't tell me that, Kim. I can't imagine much less than this," Tiffanni said.
"Stop the comedy and get dressed," Kim said.
"I'll try, but this isn't going to be easy," Tiffanni said.
"Enough," Kim said.

The girls had a lot of fun at the lake. They swam for a while and watched the good-looking guys strut by. After lunch, they laid in the sun trying to enhance their tans. While Kim and Patty watched the beef-cake playing volleyball, Tiffanni drifted off to sleep. She sank deeper and deeper into the world ruled by dreams and haunted by nightmares . . . and daymares.
Kim and Patty's attention to the volleyball game was rudely interrupted by a scream beside them. At the same time, the ball fell to the ground as play was interrupted. Kim grabbed Tiffanni's shoulders and shook her trying to wake her up.

"Tiffanni wake up!" Kim hollered.
Tiffanni stopped yelling. The sunlight hurt her eyes. She focused on Kim's face and reality began to settle in. Still slightly bewildered, she said, "Kim?"
"Yes, it's me," Kim said. "Are you all right?"
Tiffanni looked around and found herself to be the center of attention. She rubbed her eyes and said, "I'm O.K. It's just another dream."
"That's one hell of a dream if it can make you scream like that," Kim said. "How long have you been having dreams like that?" Tiffanni didn't answer. She just exchanged glances with Kim. "Well," Kim said. "I think it's time to leave."
"Yea," Patty said. She did not fully understanding what was going on but she followed Kim's lead. "I've got a lot of homework to do anyway."
Tiffanni nodded her head and tried to smile.

The ride back to Kim's house was quiet. Tiffanni stared into space thinking about her baby. When David left her, all she could think to do was have an abortion. Now she could not figure out why she did it. Every bit of logic in her head told her it was better that way. She was too young with no way to raise a child, especially by herself. Her heart was in direct conflict with her mind. Her insides kept telling her that she should have kept it. She killed her own baby. The heart won the battle with the mind and Tiffanni began to cry.

Patty tapped Kim on the shoulder and whispered, "Go ahead and drop me off at my house. I'll pick up my stuff later." Kim nodded her head. When Patty climbed out of the station wagon, she said, "I'll see you in school tomorrow. O.K. Tiff?"

Tiffanni didn't answer. Kim nodded to Patty to let her know it would be all right. Back at Kim's house, Tiffanni sat on the couch and stared at the floor. She knew her friends were worried, especially Kim. Kim sat on the coffee table in front of Tiffanni. "Why didn't you tell me you were having bad dreams?"
"They're only dreams," Tiffanni said. "There's nothing special about them."
"Normal dreams don't wake you up screaming at the top of your lungs, Tiffanni," Kim said. "I know you well enough to know when something is wrong. You talk to me, right now. What's with these dreams?"
"How the hell should I know?" Tiffanni said. "I'm not some fucking psychiatrist." Tears began to roll down her cheeks again.
"Calm down," Kim said. "Tell me about the baby. Is it still bothering you?"
"I made a big mistake," Tiffanni said.
"Well, it was David's mistake too," Kim said.
"No," Tiffanni said. "I don't mean getting pregnant. I mean the abortion. I shouldn't have done it."
"We had this talk before," Kim said. "Look, I know how you feel. You're just going to have to try and forget about it. Nothing in this world is going to bring that baby back. You have to deal with it. Pretending it didn't happen won't stop the dreams. You have to face it, deal with it, and forget about it."
Tiffanni's mascara was doing a good racoon imitation. "This isn't like burning cookies in home-Ec. It was a baby. It was my baby."
"Tiffanni, I know how hard it is," Kim said.
"No, you don't," Tiffanni said. "You can't understand."

Kim held Tiffanni's shoulders and looked deep into her eyes. "Tiffanni, I understand!"
During the time that Kim was helping Tiffanni fight the war between mind and heart, the war in the dark land of the lost ones waged relentlessly. The unborn army had yet to lose a battle. That night there was an added anger among the ranks. A previous battle had to be postponed. In half a moment before the order to attack could be given, the bad one's solitude was interrupted. They planned the next attack early. As soon as the last light was gone, revenge would come again. Tension flared in anticipation. When the light finally faded, they rushed to battle.
The bad one was relaxing in a tub of soapy water . . .

When Tiffanni got home, she went straight to her room and unpacked. She soon found herself standing in front of her mirror. She tried to imagine herself with a swollen stomach. Pregnancy couldn't be that bad, could it? Bringing a life into the world must have some reward. Sure, it would be a lot of work, but wouldn't a baby be worth it? After all it is a baby. Well, it was a baby.
chapter five

Click . . . click . . . click, TING! Tiffanni sat in her typing class. It was Tuesday. She looked over at Kim's empty desk again. Kim had skipped school when her mother was out of town before, but never two days in a row. Tiffanni tried to call Kim's house. No answer. She even tried knocking on her door. Nothing.

The rest of that day and into the next, there was no Kim. Tiffanni was walking home when she saw a taxi pull up in front of Kim's house. Kim's mother was home. She waved to Tiffanni. "Tiffanni, do you know where Kim is? I called last night to let her know when my plane got in, but there was no answer."
"I don't know," Tiffanni said. "We haven't seen her for a few days."
"Well," Mrs. Harling said. "We'll soon find out what's going on around here. Come on in."
The house seemed stale. There was only the faint sound of a radio coming from the bathroom. Something told Tiffanni that there was something very wrong.
"Kim! Come here this minute!" Mrs. Harling yelled. There was no answer. Mrs. Harling yelled again. Tiffanni sat her books on the table. When se turned back around, she saw Mrs. Harling standing in the door way to the bathroom. She was frozen still as a statue. She looked like she had seen a ghost.
"Mrs. Harling?" Tiffanni said. "Are you all right?"

Mrs. Harling moved in slow motion, pointing into the bathroom. Tiffanni looked and saw the woman's ghost. There was a blood drenched body lying face down on the floor. Tiffanni stepped into the bathroom. She couldn't stop herself. She was moving against her will. Tiffanni turned the body over. Kim's dead eyes were wide open. They seemed to stare at Tiffanni eye to eye. Tiffanni started to put her hand over her mouth, but stopped when she saw the blood on it. That was when her stomach began to revolt.

It only took a minute for the police to arrive after Tiffanni called. Kim's mother was catatonic. A paramedic sat her on the couch. There were dozens of flashing lights outside. The gathering crowd was getting bigger by the minute. Since Mrs. Harling was unable to speak, the police drilled Tiffanni with questions.

The questions came at Tiffanni from all sides. "The last time I saw her was Sunday night . . . NO. She and Eric got along great . . . I don't know . . . Her mother was out of town on a business trip . . . I don't know!"

A detective interrupted the interrogation and waved the other officers off. "I know this hasn't been a good day for you," He said. "I'm going to have one of my men drive you home. It's going to be hard, but try to relax. Get some sleep if you can. If there are any more questions, I'll call you."

Richard heard a car pull into the driveway and ran to the window. He couldn't wait to see Tiffanni get in trouble for getting home so late. His mother was furious. When he saw the officer helping Tiffanni out of the car, he yelled, "Ma, the cops brought Tiff home."
Richard ran to the door and opened it. Tiffanni walked past everybody without saying a word. Her mother started to yell, but stopped when the police officer stepped through the door. Tiffanni went straight to her room. The officer had a long talk with her mother.

In the dark land of the lost ones, the fury that had been driving the unborn army was beginning to lose its hold on some of the soldiers. Undeveloped consciences blocked out the red light of revenge and turned its sweet taste sour. Still more concerning to the still angry majority, there were some that were losing their taste for war. Most were those who had not yet taken their revenge on the bad ones. Without those few to lead the army, the battles they were to fight could not be fought. There was concern. Would the apprehension of the few keep the army from reaching its goal?

The angry ones said it would not. They would stop the few. Tempers, once directed toward the bad ones, turned inward toward the ranks of the army. The lost ones began to learn that a war against an outside enemy is more satisfying than one against your own kind. When the war began, there was never a thought that an underground would develop out of an emotion that was not fully developed itself.

There was hope that a successful maneuver would help extinguish the melancholy of the few. The bad one dwelled in a large suburban house. Its mate had left. The army climbed the stairs toward the room. In this case the crime was committed over a decade ago. It was time to settle the score.

With unimaginable quietness, the army surrounded the bed. The leader climbed up to look at the sleeping bad one. It was on its side with its back to the leader. As distance between the foes shortened, the bad one rolled onto its back. The woman's stomach was swollen in at least eight months of pregnancy. The leader's anger faded to nothing. In that undeveloped mind, the woman had made up for her crime. No revenge was taken.
"No unborn life shall suffer!"

Tiffanni was awakened the next day by a beam of sunlight prying through her bedroom curtains. She looked at her clock. It said 12:47. Tiffanni panicked. She missed half a day of school. Then her memory recalled the previous day. A silent tear ran down Tiffanni's cheek in sorrow for a lost friend.

Some time later, Richard popped his head through Tiffanni's door. "Hi. Ya don' O.K.?"
"Yea," Tiffanni answered.
Richard pushed the door opened and stepped into the room. "Ma said ta leave ya 'lone. I was wondrin' how ya were. Ya didn' get up fer breakfast an' ya went to bed early last night, so I.. um didn' get to ask ya."
Tiffanni gave him the biggest hug she ever gave anyone. "I'm fine." She began to cry again. "I'm even better now that you asked."
Richard wiggled loose. "I'll see ya later then, Tiff . . . uh, Tiffanni."
Richard ran from the room and ran into Patty. She said, "How are you doing?"
Tiffanni stood and embraced her friend without talking. Patty's presence emphasized the fact that Tiffanni had one less friend. Tiffanni sniffled and wiped her eyes again. Patty broke the long silence. "I missed you in school today."
Tiffanni sat on the bed again. "What did I miss?"
"Nothing at all," Patty said. "The whole school was moving about half speed. All we did in English was read. A lot of people asked me to say hello. Even the teachers."
"You'll have to tell them thanks for me. My mom is letting me stay home again tomorrow," Tiffanni said.
"How are you holding up?" Patty said.
"All right I guess," Tiffanni said. "I've been listening to the radio and every other song reminds me of something that Kim said or did."
Patty asked, "Have you heard anything about her?"
"The funeral is Sunday afternoon," Tiffanni said.
"I know. They announced it over the intercom at school," Patty said. "I meant about what happened. Did they find out anything?"
"I don't know." The damn broke and Tiffanni's cheeks were flooded with tears.

chapter six
The incident with the pregnant woman did not help the efforts to control the few. The few were able to secure a steady ledge that would hold as long as the war raged. In a single phrase, the first war hero was "born." Those who become legends do not set out to do so. It comes from an action taken when that action was not expected. "No unborn life shall suffer!" The few's regret was growing rapidly. Tiffanni's almost little girl had joined the few. The unborn was as passionate as its assassin-mother. Its turn to lead would be soon. It did not wish to lead. It wanted to live.
Tiffanni returned to school on Monday. She was waiting for Patty by her locker when David walked up. He held up his hands and said, "Truce, O.K.?" Tiffanni nodded. "I'm sorry about Kim. I wish I knew what to say to make you feel better. I know how close the two of you were and . . "
"What do you want, David?" Tiffanni said.
He said, "I wanted to apologize for . . . "
"It's too late for apologies." Her voice was cold. "Two lives that were close to me are over, and I killed one of them. An apology won't bring back my baby or my friend. I don't want to play any stupid games any more. Just leave me alone."

Speechless, David turned and walked away. This time his own heart felt the pain caused by the footsteps that carried him out of Tiffanni's life. Finally, after all that had happened, he realized what it must have been like to go through it alone. There are many lessons to be learned in life. Why do so many of them have to be painful? He looked over his shoulder one last time. Tiffanni was crying on Patty's shoulder.

Patty ignored the bell that said that class was starting. The students in study hall watched the girls outside the door. The teacher told them to get to work and closed the door. On the attendance roster, he marked the girls as present and allowed them the time to take care of it.
Tiffanni's crying became hysterical. Patty took her to the restroom to avoid a scene. A teacher patrolling the halls heard the crying and poked her head in. "Is she all right?"
"She'll be O.K.," Patty answered. Tiffanni was starting to calm down.
"Who are you two?"
"I'm Patty Allen and this is Tiffanni Catlogg. We're supposed to be in study hall." Tiffanni wiped her eyes.
The teacher recognized Tiffanni's name as the one that found the dead girl. "Go ahead and take as much time as you need." She said and left the girls alone.
"Are you O.K. now?" Patty asked.
"Yea. I think so," Tiffanni said.
"I don't mean to be unsympathetic, Tiffanni," Patty said. "But, you need to get over this. I miss Kim as much as you do, but all the crying in the world isn't going to bring her back. It's not going to make you pregnant again either."
"She told me that exact same thing," Tiffanni said. "It was the last advice she ever gave me."
"Well then listen to her and get on with your life," Patty said. "Should we go back to study hall?"
"What for?" Tiffanni said. "That teacher said to take as much time as we wanted to. Let's hang out here for the rest of the day."

Two days later, Tiffanni was still having crying attacks. The tears didn't run for her lost friend though. They ran for her aborted baby. The waterworks were running heavy when she picked up the phone and dialed Patty's number. It had been dark for about an hour. A powerful thunderstorm had rolled in suddenly and was thrashing the earth with its fury.
Rriinng...... rriinng..... rri "Hello."
"Hi, Patty. It's me," Tiffanni said through her sobs.
Patty sighed and said, "Here we go again."
"You must be getting tired of me," Tiffanni said.
"No," Patty said. "I just wish you'd quit torturing yourself."
"I'm trying, Patty. I really am. My folks and Richard went out. I didn't want to be alone," Tiffanni said.
"They went out in this shit?" Patty asked.
"It wasn't this bad when they left," Tiffanni said.
"I suppose you want to talk about your baby again," Patty said.
Tiffanni sniffled. "If you don't mind. Do you think I could raise a child?"
Patty thought for a moment. "I think you would make a wonderful mother, but not right now. Maybe when you're a little older, you'll get another chance."
"How did you get so wise?" Tiffanni asked.
"I had a good teacher and years of practice," Patty said. "Not to be rude, but I've got to go. Are you going to be O.K.?"
"Yea. I think so. Thanks for listening," Tiffanni said.
"Anytime," Patty said. "Bye - bye."

Tiffanni sat on her bed and leaned against the wall pondering the subject of her baby.
With the last brutal attack, the few lost valuable ground. They lost still more when one of the few gave in to the army and agreed to lead. That feminine one had no desire for revenge. It only wanted to live. The door was open just enough for the reluctant leader to peak through and see the objective. The bad one was holding something to its face and was talking into it. There was water on its face that it wiped off with its hand. The unborn watched the bad one. She could not understand the words, but she could hear the sorrow in its voice. The bad one put down the thing it was holding and sat on the bed. The leader watched intently. The army was getting impatient. They wanted war. They wanted revenge. They did not want to wait any longer, but they had no choice. The one denied life must be the first to strike at the bad one who denied life to her.

The bad one closed its eyes. The army entered the room with defining silence. The leader climbed up the bed and stood looking at the bad one. It was very beautiful. The leader wanted to know why such a lovely girl would do such a vial thing. The question surged in the undeveloped mind. Why?

The bond between mother and child is often so great that they share not only blood, but spirit as well. Why? The question was so strongly concentrated on that Tiffanni heard the thoughts of her unborn child. Tiffanni opened her eyes to see the undeveloped face of her daughter that was to be.
"Why?" The question raged from the child's mind.
"I'm so sorry!" Tiffanni said without using her voice. The tears began again.
The child was surprised. She heard her mother's thoughts and understood them. Again the child said, "Why?"
"I did it without thinking," Tiffanni told her child. "It was a mistake. I wish I could undo it. I want you back so much."
"I share your desire," the child said.

In their shared thoughts, the two realized that maybe there was a chance. The army stood bewildered. The want for revenge was gone. The few became the many and all. Driven by pure passion and not thinking about what was happening, Tiffanni undressed below the waist. She threw her clothes on the floor and covered many of the ex-soldiers.

The child approached Tiffanni. Tiffanni was leaning against the wall with her legs opened to her child. The child looked at her mother again and placed a hand on the inside of Tiffanni's thigh. Tiffanni flinched from the cold touch. The child looked back at the army. They were entranced. They watched as the child entered Tiffanni's body. The child made its way back through the passage that it was cruelly forced out of. She went back to her mother's womb to grow and live.
Tiffanni felt the child enter her. There was only slight pressure inside her. When the baby stopped moving and settled for its nine month rest, Tiffanni took a deep breath. Her heart was beating like a hummingbird's. She put a hand on her stomach. A dream had been answered and a nightmare ended. She looked around the room. The army was gone. They had abandoned their war and were resting peacefully. It was over.

Tiffanni heard a car pull up outside. Her parents were home. She pulled her jeans back on and rushed downstairs to meet them. Her mother came through the door just as Tiffanni reached the bottom of the stairs. Tiffanni threw her arms around her mother and hugged her tight. Joy's tears were in her eyes.

"Momma, have I got something to tell you." Her enthusiasm was almost sickening.
"What is it?" Her mother asked. "Are you all right?"
"I'm better than all right," Tiffanni sang. "I'm pregnant!"

Eighteen months later . . .
Patty pulled up in front of Tiffanni's house in her father's car. Tiffanni and her daughter, Kim Harling Catlogg, were in the front yard enjoying the sunshine. Patty picked up Kim and said, "How's my little god - daughter today?"
"She's just peachy," Tiffanni answered. "How was work?"
"Fabulous," Patty said as she sat on the grass next to Tiffanni. "I have some news that you might be interested in."
"What's that?" Tiffanni asked.
Patty smiled and giggled a little. "David got fired today."

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